As humans we seem to always be looking for something or someone to blame for the negative situations that life presents to us. Sometimes this is necessary in order to move forward, but when does this kind of behavior go too far?
Of course we will look for reasons why something like an affair, or breakup happened. It is in our nature to work out just how these things started and affirm whether or not anything could have been done to stop it or to have changed the outcome.
Even though sometimes, when we do learn those reasons, the mind still does not accept them and this is when you can spend hours, days and even months analysing and wondering if there had of been anything you could have done, which in turn can end up just wasting your time and energy. The emotional attachment to all of this can wear you down, especially when none of it was your fault from the start.
I must admit I recently found myself in the situation I described above and it’s hard not to look back and think of things you could have changed or done differently, especially when it’s not just me that I needed to consider. Being a new mum brought so much pressure into my life, doing the job by myself has created challenges I never thought I could handle before motherhood and my mind seemed to be constantly in overdrive.
So, over the past week I’ve been listening to Tony Robins to keep my mind flowing with positive reassurance about my situation. It has shown me how a simple decision that we make today can change our lives for the foreseeable future. Now I do believe that it can be this simple…..but as human beings we have been conditioned to think that it will not be this easy because we have a tendency to stay away from things that are painful or outside our personal comfortable zones and continue with decisions of pleasure or comfort.
In order to start conditioning our brains for the better, we must associate pleasure with things that we once thought were painful:
• The pain of having to start a new life again – Or the exciting opportunities ahead
• The pain of getting over a broken heart – Or the pleasure of finding someone to never break it again
• The pain of thinking your world has ended – Or the pleasure knowing it has just began
• The pain of being a single mum– Or the pleasure of giving my daughter all the happiness she deserves by being a fantastic mummy
• The pain of losing all your efforts made in your previous life or businesses – or the excitement of the potential you know, you have to further your life and/or businesses
The list goes on but you can obviously see if we keep linking pain to our current situation, its never going to change for the better, is it?
Personally I know how far I have come in my life, the dedication I have put towards my businesses, helping others and the pure love I gave and continue to give. But taking the focus from the pain of what was taken away from me and putting the right mindset, decisions and determination into the excitement of my future will not only bring the optimistic path that I am meant to be on, but also the rewarding successful future that I know I deserve!
The universe gives us these challenges to make us realise our potential in life and I will rise above and prove my worth.
As I mentioned in my first blog, I am writing this as I am aware a lot more people out there are experiencing something similar and I’m hoping this will help others too.
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